Yep. It´s just one of those days. Nothing particularly new or different...there are two retreat groups in country (who are AWESOME by the way...go Xaverian Brothers HS and Fairfield Prep!), I accompanied FP to Nuevo Mundo & was able to see Chris teach a class for the first time, then headed back to Sinai and had a great chat with LuzMaria, one of our neighbors, and the entire time my heart and gut were/are aching for home. Who knows why? It´s a random Thursday with nothing particularly ¨homey¨ about it. But I would give just about anything right now to curl up on the couch with my family and watch Big Bang Theory (despite Mom´s protests) after dinner or go to Cowgirls´ and dance the night away with my girls. Heck, I´d settle for a MCAT study session with my fellow masochistic doctors-to-be just for an ounce of familiarity and home.
I knew going into this year that missing home was going to be a struggle. How could it not be? And I think I was/am surprised at how rare these bouts actually are. Maybe it is due to the fact that life here is so crazy, overwhelming and full that you don´t have a chance to really think about home or maybe that nothing resembles home enough to really make you nostalgic (which almost guarantees some extent of homesickness...), probably a little of both. And I´m sure part of it is also that we are creating a 2nd home here. It is certainly interesting to think about September and mull over the fact that I will likely be ¨homesick¨ for Ecuador...!
But I think it is the rarity, the unfamiliarity, of this ¨illness¨ that makes it affect me so much when it does decide to strike. I am not accustomed to it; so this foreign, sudden need/desire to talk to people from home, to see something from my first 21 years of life and it can really knock me for a loop.
So here I am, spinning around, dizzy from the punch and trying to refocus. Haha...maybe writing this will accelerate the process ;) Or it won´t and this post only served as a glimpse into another one of the twists in this journey. Either way, I suppose it was worth it!
God Bless.
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